It’s a little over a year since the creation of the “Surviving Sexual Abuse in the Caribbean” Facebook and the power of one page https://www.facebook.com/pages/PROSAF-Surviving-Sexual-Abuse-in-the-Caribbean/165341356853908 / https://www.facebook.com/pages/PROSAF_ThePower-OfOne/167808243298256?ref=pb and about 8-10 months since the creation of the twitter pages- http://twitter.com/#!/PROSAF_Sueezzy / http://twitter.com/#!/VelikaLawrence .We have recently invested and created our own website http://www.prosaf.org/ . PROSAF - Positive Reactions Over Secrets And Fear; was created to give survivors the chance to share their stories in a supportive environment.
The creation of these sites meant having to face the fact that I was sexually abused by my older half brother, It meant understanding that I would have to face the comments and judgments that came with this decision to speak up and out about my past and how it has impacted me and continues to affect me. It meant coming to grips with the fact that society is quicker to absolve and believe those who abuse that to support and believe those who are being/have been abused. It meant understanding the grave epidemic that affects out country-sexual assault is more common than we are willing to believe and more common than statistics show. Sexual Assault is one of the most under-reported crimes an contrary to popular belief it isn’t about sex but about power & control over another human being. In the end the decision to do it all was worth it. There is a large part of me that feels liberated and free for taking the opportunity to do this- a chance to let other survivors know they are not alone; that we are a family of survivors, that there is hope for the future.
I knew when I left college that I wanted to find a way to change our circumstances in St.Lucia. I wanted to actually stand up for women’s rights, for their right to freedom, to voice their opinions, for their rights to be seen and treated as individuals who are worthy, to fight for their right to be treated properly. I think speaking out allows us to take a step in the right direction; we are no longer holding onto this secret, we are no longer protecting our abusers. Speaking out also allows you to voice what happened, to face it, it helps break down some of the illusions you created that you so desperately needed to get through your horrible times. Addressing the issues that arise with Childhood Sexual Abuse, Rape & various forms of Sexual Assault isn’t easy but it is necessary.
I fooled myself into believing that I could shut the door, not address and it would just go away but that hasn’t been the case. I can tell you that the issues that arise out of what we have been through don’t just disappear, it takes hard work and time to get through it. At some point we have to be honest with ourselves and face the harsh realities of what has been done to us. I have found that in order for us to heal we have to face it, we have to address it. That is what these sites were created to do; to give you a safe place to voice what happened to you, how you felt, how you feel, to give you the chance to be surrounded by people who went through the something similar and to be able to get resources that can help.
PROSAF- Positive Reactions Over Secrets & Fear is comprised of 2 sections SSAITCO-Surviving Sexual Abuse in The Caribbean and ThePower Ofone created by Velika Lawrence- below she explains in her own words what ThePower Ofone is. ThePower Ofone refers to the idea that each individual and each single family unit are capable and have a responsibility to each other, and to society as long as they are existing. Growing up under circumstances where I found herself having to adapt and move forward constantly in changing environments, I recognized that most of my peers did not have the aptitude that I did. I was fortunate enough to have parents who were committed to educating my siblings and myself in age appropriate methods, about life and its many challenges and harsh realities. I realized that most people I grew up with did not have the advantage of understanding the value of perspective and reality, with the option of various tools for coping with emotions and facts. I have found that the majority of people in our communities are complacent and feel comfortable with being apathetic and irresponsible. This attitude and approach to life in general does promote the overall quality of life. The goal of ThePower Ofone is to encourage a more progressive perspective in all communities. There is a great need for all forms of education at all levels and ages and a need to redefine the responsibility of ever member of society; starting in the home.
The idea behind PROSAF- Positive Reactions of Secrets & Fear, was to educate, empower, support & inspire all to make change, to seek change and to understand the need for change. Over time we have grown connected to the triumphs over challenges faced in the family & our daily lives because of our experiences. Dealing with the feelings of fear, confusion and anger, self worth were a huge part of the steps to move forward. We have found that in seeking support from others, we came into contact with many others who have suffered similar experiences. This motivated us to be part of the change we wanted for ourselves and for others who are still trapped physically and psychologically. PROSAF is our contribution to the steps to move forward through challenges faced by the family unit and the effect of sexual abuse on a victim or survivor.
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